When you spend an entire year focusing on something, it's weird when you no longer have it. I have felt this way on and off since walking out of the Assessment Center on May 14, having finished my National Board exams. For a little while, there was euphoria: whew, I'm finally done. Not long after, however, you sort of feel a sense of loss because this is something that overtook your life for such a long time (a school-year is a long time).
I find myself as we are approaching Back-to-School reflecting upon all of the things I learned last year. Even if I don't certify this year, I won't give up. I will step back into the ring and try again. It's kind of what I do. But in all seriousness, I am approaching ALL aspects of my curriculum planning differently. How can I truly maximize every moment I have with my students? How can I fit in just one more thing to help my students make progress?
Those are the thoughts floating through my head this August. It's this time of year I often get what I have dubbed "August insomnia" because I have so many ideas and things I want to do that I can't sleep. It hasn't happened yet but I'm sure it will. I have so many things I want to do for my classroom this year: not just for looks, but for productivity. I want to give my students the absolute BEST year they can have. Focus, determination and the growth I made going through National Board has invigorated me in ways I never thought would be possible for me. Teaching is my passion--it's who I am and what I do.
But this is powerful. A year of hard work, scrutinizing, analyzing, freaking out and going back to the drawing board have me reflecting on what I've done in the past and what I will do in the future. It is a really awesome feeling to know that no matter if I see a "Congratulations" on my screen in November or not that I have grown. I have changed. I have made a difference for myself and for my future students simply by embarking upon the process.
That knowledge, reflection and power are priceless.
5 comments:
When will you find out the results?
If I am lucky, by Thanksgiving. Could be as late as Dec 31 but usually they are out in November some time.
Good luck to you! I am going through it this year. It's definitely made me feel exactly what you posted about! How can I fit just one more thing in?! lol I've written 3 different accomplishments for entry 4 already...obvioulsy they need fine tuning and am about to begin delving into the other 3 to make sure I do it all, or at least have enough to choose from! Any tips?! I'd love some!
My suggestion would be to find support boards online in your certificate area. I joined ecgen.org which originally started out as a board for Early Childhood Generalists (hence the name) but has expanded to Middle Childhood Generalist and Early-Middle Childhood Literacy which is the certificate that I did. There are a Yahoo! groups for most of the areas that I know about. It's definitely good to get in with a cohort of some sort early so that you are able to bounce ideas off of each other and get advice from people who have "been there, done that" :)
Raye, Thank you so much for bloggging your journey! I am just starting the process and I found your honest reflection so helpful! You and I are a lot alike and see eye to eye on things so I was so relieved to read all your blogs entries.. they were real and not textbook sounding like the NB website is. I wish you well and hope you rocked it... I will check back...
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